You told me I should

Write a poem about it.

I laughed and said

I would never.

So I wrote a poem

About it.

You told me I should

Write a poem about it,

You didn't say

I should get medicated

Or shout 

Or run away.

You simply stayed.

For the moment.

For one last moment.

To enjoy the taste of a slow morning,

One last, really slow shared morning.

One last caress,

One last laugh,

One last silent

Complicit smile.

For the warmth of our naked bodies

Knowing exactly

how to hold each other.

I cried and wiped my tears on your shoulder,

in the middle of a laughter.

And you had questions

-So did I-

But how to explain 

That it simply felt right?

To choose to let go

Mid flight,

While the kisses still felt

Simple and light,

Of love that would have never

Really been mine.

Of the memories we built

On borrowed time.

That night I slept

In my bed,

On both sides.

The next morning

I made coffee for myself,

added water 

To my cup,

 

And I smiled.

Fragile peace

All_ I wanted was a piece of grass
To walk barefoot, forget the past
Take my shoes off, and feel the sand
Careless, not needing you to hold my hand.

All_ I wanted was to sleep in peace.
To keep the doors unlocked, be calm and still.
Still arms and eyes shut, knowing
you'd still catch me if I was falling.

And watch_ you grow like a tree,
For love's nothing but a seed.
To become, to thrive together,
Protect ourselves become our shelter.

All_ I wanted was to breath
When each of my shaking bones asked me to leave.
I stayed, I just wanted the now_ to last.
Stuck in the memory of all that happened too fast.

All_my words like knifes
I had to swallow
To protect us from our downfall
They eventually tore_ my body open, 

Bled me dry_

---
You said only I can decide to trust you
So I did, I trusted you, and you broke me.
And broken, I decided not to trust you,
and so, I began to see the the wreck unfolding.

---

You asked me to trust you...
So I told myself not to trust myself
To trust you instead
You said you had a good memory,
You recalled best,
So I told myself not to trust myself
To trust you instead
Look what a mess you've made.
I guess now I know
What it's like to miss a shadow
The shadow of a friend
The shadow of a human.
 

---

When do they stop
The sleepless nights
The thirst for truth
The thirst for compassion?

When does it stop
And when do I start?
I want to start
I want a fresh start
A brand new...

---

 

I miss me 

Before you broke me.

The better, free me.

The careless lover.

The one who trusted blindly,

The one who could just

 close her eyes and sleep.

 

لا

"police recently declined to move forward with the case because, police claim, the woman never told Justin Sane “no,” according to Rolling Stone."

Just say no!
To the man
twice your size
Who dares to wrap
His fingers around your wrists.

The man who touched your head
Like a father to his child
If
children could be owned,
Told you when to stand,
Told you where to sit.

To the man who said:
"I'll kill myself if you leave
I cut my flesh, watch me bleed,
If I become the devil
Know you planted the seed"

"Just say no" they say,
"Just say no"
but would they
dare to take the risk?

Just say no to the poet
The man you looked up to
who rhymes about justice and sin,
Told you not to be afraid
To just put your trust in him.

Just say no,
Under his weight,
As he pushes his body,
"don't be afraid",
He would never hurt your skin.

Say no,
To the man with the psycho grin
The man who owns the world
And knows
the world knows we owe him.

The man with the cat eyes
Piercing, from across the room.
The beautiful man, who loves his family,
He'd never do that, not him,
It's an unfortunate misunderstanding!

Say no,
It's just a word
And words are just that, words,
They're letters on a string.
The loud man
Taking up all the space
As if the oxygen was his.
The man that doesn't have hands
No, that man... he's got fists.

Just say no
When he laughs at you
Saying "don't be afraid!
Follow my pace.
Enter the cage
Be nice, swallow your rage,
Just listen and smile
I'll make sure you're safe."
Locked behind bars
His personal slave.

And if despite your no, he still pushes
It's your fault! I forgot to mention
Cause if your "no" was not convincing
It may have been an invitation.
It's your fault they'll repeat
Until you learn the lesson.
That only as property
You will deserve respect and affection.

But know that as property, too,
You may not be granted protection.
The honest man will dare say it's your fault:
you never asked the right questions.
The one that shared your bed
But never dared to show his face
Entered your temple just to break
your cocoon from within.
The nameless shell left you starving,
now on the quest for his next victim.

You were misled, I hear,
You did not know.
You did not say yes, my dear,
but did you say no? 

"A 19 year old is like a piece of clay, I get it. They want to tailor make their mate."

It was all an accident

 Life is an accident, 

the quest for love, for understanding. 

The maze.

The hope, the disappointment. 

Nothing is planned. 

Nothing goes as planned.

There is no light at the end of the tunnel.

You are the tunnel.

You are the light, many times,

but also the darkness, most of the times.

You are the failure and the success.

The suffering is an accident, 

the happiness will be, too. 

You are the luckiest person on Earth, 

by chance, some days.

You are brave, for daring to live. 

You are brave, for allowing yourself to grieve.

You are there. 

You're almost there.

And if you finally make it, 

it was not written, 

it was not meant, 

but you will have made it.

By accident.

teoría del caos II

 El enemigo

era yo. 

Era la espera.

Era la vergüenza, 

de convertirme en tedio, 

de saberte inmutable.

De rogarte

que me prestaras tu oído,

para que vieras mis entrañas

y tus manos

bañadas de sangre. 

Era leer tu voz

y darle otro tono.

Pintarte alas

y llamarte ángel,

y cegarme

y llamarte luz, 

ignorarme ciega,

ignorarme humana.

Poner a prueba la existencia

por querer descubrir

cuánta espera cabe en un cuerpo.

Cuánto vacío cabe

en la palabra afecto.

.